It IS a miracle...

So a friend from high school sent me a Facebook message today, and in responding to her, I realized that I expressed some of my deepest feelings about being pregnant - so I am going to share my response to her and hopefully be able to express my feelings a little better:

"Thanks for the encouragement!! I actually am enjoying my pregnancy...people keep telling me I have a glow about me, which I don't really understand, but I LOVE feeling this little guy move and roll and stick his foot out so that I can feel it poking through! I was telling my hubby yesterday that it is hard not being able to breathe, and it is very hard to get comfortable when I am trying to just sit and read or something (I am in an online grad class right now), but other than that, I have had an ideal pregnancy!

At the same time, I am scared about a lot of things - giving birth, taking care of a newborn, our changing life, but I just can't wait to hold our little boy in our arms and fall so deeply in love!! I also can't wait to see Eli become a daddy; I think it will transform our relationship forever!"

I realized that I hope that I am not complaining too much and giving the impression that being pregnant is not the miracle that it is...because it truly is a miracle and something so unique that God provided just to women! It has changed my life, and I just wanted to share that!

Here I am this week:

I didn't realize I'd be so exhausted...

So here I am, a whole month since my last post....and a whole month bigger!! I didn't realize I was going to feel this tired and blah...that's what I told a friend about this blogging stuff - I'd love to keep posting regularly, but it usually ends up needing to be a choice between doing the wash or putting my feet up or blogging, and I have to prioritize!

This belly feels so big and in the way, that sometimes it's hard just to do the day-to-day stuff. The amazing thing is that this is the time when my belly will grow the fastest, since this is when the baby is growing the fastest.

Since my last post, Sara and I traveled to California and back, my parents and Aunt Duckie came and helped to get the nursery all set up, and I grew a lot! California went well and it was wonderful to see family members who I haven't seen in over ten years, but it was also good to be home. I didn't realize how much I would miss Eli (and Rooney, admittedly) and it was tough because I had to take care of myself and I was very emotional! But all and all, Sara and I did well, and I didn't even really want to kill her :) Haha, just kidding, we had a good time.

Last weekend, my parents and Aunt Duckie came up to help us do whatever we needed to do. Eli needed to replace the insulation in the attic, which was a HUGE job, and fortunately my dad was able to help him to do that, which was SUCH a weight off of our shoulders. Also, the nursery was halfway set up, but there were bags and gifts and diapers and things all over the place. So my mom and Aunt Duckie helped to wash everything and get it all organized and put away. We bought all of the little things we needed to complete the nursery, and we even decorated! I will post a few pictures as soon as I get a chance. It feels nice to just sit in there now, knowing that it is really ready to add Little Boy Landers. All in all, we had a really good time this weekend and it was such a huge help to us!

I have been SO fortunate in my pregnancy so far, and one blessing is that I have slept really well. But now, it's getting harder just to simply lay down without effort. I have a gigantic body pillow that I sleep with to elevate my legs and my belly, so essentially there are now FOUR people in our bed, which leaves very little room. Every turn or roll over or anything takes massive effort, which means that I wake up! It doesn't help that I have to pee about four times a night....but at least when I sleep I actually sleep. And please....don't respond with a comment that says that I should enjoy the sleep I am getting now...I am well aware that things are going to get really tough, and that I will be exhausted when the baby comes.

I've actually been getting pretty nervous about the labor and delivery and the baby coming. I can't believe how out of control my emotions feel, and I can cry at the drop of a hat! I was sobbing at the finale of The Bachelorette the other night! Then on the way to work I heard that song on the radio by Mark Schultz about Walking Her Home, and I started crying then too! Crazy...

But lots of things are falling into place now and that feels really good. I had an appointment with a pediatrician today so that we now have a pediatrician, the nursery is ready, we have pretty much all of the essential items we need, so we are really getting ready. Now it is just Eli and me that have to get ready....but how do we do that? I don't know....I guess that just happens....